Oh, fortheloveofallthatisholyandgood!!!

So, today I get to go BACK in and be seen by the colon-rectal surgeons.

Because things have become "not quite right" over the past 3 days.

I'll be taking wagers now. What do you think the issue is?
1.  Fistula, requiring an actual surgery in an actual OR tomorrow, or
2.  Mystery problem, possibly a second abscess developing.

More later, I'm sure.  We just can't do without a little drama around here every 3 weeks or so, it seems!

Update:

I will spare you all the long, boring details, since we did so much of that last time.  Long story short:  I am not near death.  Should I happen to actually be developing a fistula, we won't know that for a month or two at the earliest.  As of right now it looks like my abscess healed too fast (as it sometimes happens in "young, very healthy people" says the Dr.  Thanks Doc.  I'll take it.), and it wasn't quite done...emptying...so it basically re-formed and then emptied on its own, as there was already an incision site as a weak point.

Man I feel sick just writing this all.  Such gross stuff we are possible of in our bodies, huh?  Sigh.  This is about as far from classy as I can get.

The Harvest Program at Preschool:

Today, when I dropped Layla off at preschool, I found out she had a program at 11:00 a.m.!!!  So, NEGATIVE organization and communication points to NeHi Preschool for THAT, but I'll forgive them, because they really are sweet, and Layla loves it there.  :)

They lined all the kids up, then told the parents "Okay, here they are!  Come take your pictures now!"  It was very smart.  So I did.  :)

It was so darn cute.  She looked very, very worried until she spotted me in the audience.  Ah, the power of being a Mommy.  Complete easement of fears, right at my fingertips.  

This little girl is named Evie, I think, and is Layla's BFF at preschool.  They like to be "silly" together, according to her teacher.  

She spent the ENTIRE program banging her hands under her pumpkin necklace.  

Her class:  12 girls, 3 boys.  

Finally doing a few actions to a song...

Taking a bow.  On her own.  

Videos from the program: (for only the truly curious and dedicated, I'm sure.  No guilt if you don't want to watch these!  Seriously.  I barely did.)  ;)  The funny thing is, I was having a really hard time pushing the "off" button to stop recording each little video, so they get shaky at the end sometimes...but I was having such a hard time doing it because Layla wanted me to CLAP for her at the end of each song, not record her.  So I left the camera down for several...but then she started actually DOING the actions, so I had to get THAT.  ;)

Layla and the little girl next to her (to her actual right) get into a little fight in this video.  Blows are exchanged.

New food for Mr. Finn!

We now have a new food we can feed Finn:  SANDWICHES!  :)  It's so insane to me that my kids don't eat sandwiches for lunch, mostly because I grew up on them, and they are cheap.  

So, now Finn likes sandwiches!  We eased him into having Jelly on this toast, which he loves, and then I busted out the almond butter and jelly sandwich on Monday.  He loved it!  FAN-TASTIC!  

As you can see, we are also still potty training.  ;)  He is 100% successful with pee, 0% successful with poop.  Awesome.   *sigh*

"Finn, show me your sandwich!"

Layla took the next two photos.  

The Weekend.

This past weekend was a bit rare for us:  Jonas and I WENT somewhere!  Without kids!

My friend Danika from college was getting married way up north, in Biwabik MN.  Biwabik is 1.5 hours north of Duluth, on a good day (i.e. no crazy MN snow storms, etc.).  Renee and Jon kindly volunteered to come to our house and spend the night with our kids so we could attend this wedding, so obviously we said YES.  Jonas had a church meeting from 9-10:30 on Saturday morning, and then we headed out on our road trip around 11:00 a.m.

It's truly amazing to me how fast and how light I can pack when there are no kids involved.  Mind-blowing.

We were just driving 3+ hours north in our same state, but it's amazing what a difference that makes in the scenery and fall leaf colors.  I feel like we passed through at LEAST three separate climate zones.  ;)

I didn't bring my camera because:
1.  Jonas and I are rarely alone for that amount of time, and I wanted to just "be" rather than "document" the whole time.
2.  The bride had asked people to focus on enjoying the wedding rather than taking lots of their own pictures...and possibly getting in the way of her professional photographer doing their job correctly.  ;)  I fully agreed with this sentiment, and I do love to follow the rules!
3.  Now that we have kids it feels silly to take pictures of just the two of us.  Or scenery!

We arrived early, of course, per my eternal goal to never be late for anything.  We drove around the town for 4 or 5 passes, then made our way to the church and marveled at the difference between small town and "big city" living.  ;)

The wedding itself was lovely, and it was so fun to see a few friends from college there as well!  Danika has been a missionary for the last 10 years of life since college and has spend the majority of that time in Afghanistan and Taiwan.  For this, I SO admire her.  I'm sure she has wanted to be married in that time, and I'm sure trusting to the timing God might have had in her life was a struggle at times, but my friends...she didn't let the fact that she wasn't married in ANY way stop her from living a life of complete purpose and meaning in the Kingdom of God.  She went to scary lands, alone, knowing that God's direction in her life was far more important than a guy next to her.

I.  Love.  That.

I don't know her entire thought process related to this, if any, but I just love that.  Were she to have never gotten married, were she to never have any kids...her life would still be JUST as meaningful and purpose-filled as anyone married with kids.  Her situation, or those relationships in/not in her life, did NOT define her to God.  Or to me.  I just love her.  :)

Anyway, I'm very glad she HAS gotten married, because it was something she wanted.  So we wanted it for her.  :)  She married a great guy from India, and I can't wait to see the future unfold for two people who lived such great individual lives for God...what will their future look like TOGETHER?  Exciting stuff!! :)

The most fun part of the wedding for me was actually our dinner companions.  We sat at a table of 8 with two other couples from college, and it was great to catch up with them for sure, but our conversation was very...expected.  Not BAD in any way, it's just that we're all sort of at the same stages of life together, and while it's great to rejoice at houses bought and children we have, it also feels like a somewhat "small" conversations at time, if that's all that is discussed.  However, we had two dark horses join us:  two guys, who looked to be in their early to mid 40's, asked to sit at our table with us.  At first they were very quiet, just listening a lot, but as time went on it became very clear to us that these were maybe the coolest people you or I have pretty much ever met (well, okay, maybe not Scooter...but we all know we can't be at his level of schmoozing big-name people every day!).  Maybe I should say the coolest "ordinary" people you or I have ever met.  :)

Both men worked with an organization out of Colorado Springs, CO, that focuses on Afghanistan and Afghan refugees.  So, they knew the groom well because he had started a church in India to minister to Afghan refugees.

Guy #1:  (We have forgotten their names at this point because we were sort of in shock at their life stories!). Successful Doctor.  Leaves regular medical practice because he is tired of treating people who don't take care of themselves and don't treasure the gift of health.  He regularly travels to Afghanistan to train Afghan doctors on how to treat their own people, mostly in preventative medicine.  On one of these missions in 2012 he was CAPTURED by the TALIBAN and had to be rescued by Navy Seals!!  I remember this!  He was in the news!  If you don't remember, here's a link to one news clipping from the event:  http://www.nydailynews.com/news/world/colo-doctor-rescued-taliban-capture-article-1.1216514   Keep in mind he's the most quiet, humble guy you will ever meet...and the only reason we found this out is because he left the table for a moment and his companion gave his story away!  *jaws dropped all around*  Of course, he has 6 kids too, a very successful 20-year marriage, etc.  AND he has continued to go back to Afghanistan and do his training, no matter what.

Guy #2:  Married his wife at age 18.  Been married for 20+ years already.  Has TWELVE children:  4 biological, 6 adopted.  Each child they adopted they also fostered, AND they have fostered many, many more children on top of the ones they already have.  The stories he told were heartbreaking and heartwarming to to highest extent possible.  The whole family moved to Sierra Leone for a few years to be missionaries...they didn't leave when the U.S Embassy told them to (NOT cool, in my book...), or when the Sierra Leone government told them to, but they finally left when they felt like the lives of their many children were in serious danger.  His work over there was to start many small businesses to help the people be self sustaining and thrive on their own.  Each and every business he started is fully operational, years later now, and creating amazing opportunities for people there.  And he has absolutely nothing to do with them currently--he just brought a few ideas, got the ball rolling, and then left it in the hands of highly trained native peoples.  LOVE that!  His family has moved 20 times in their 20+ years of marriage due to his previous job, so his wife home-schools his twelve children.  No biggie.  On top of the work they now do with Afghan refugees, he and his wife are looking to buy an 80 acre piece of land in Missouri where they can create a home for children who age-out of the foster system there.  Heart of GOLD, guys.  Again, totally humble and completely winning in personality.  If my checkbook had been on me I'm pretty sure I would have written him a check.

 These guys were so INSPIRING to talk to.  As we drove away Jonas asked me if talking to people like that made me feel guilty, or feel like our lives should look exactly like their lives, etc.  Nope.  Not at all.  What they did inspire in me was the desire to live a large life...to not get sucked into living a small, me/us-only-centered life and to totally protect and insulate my family.  They made me want to live big IN my current life, not change my current life, you know?  I think that's a big difference.  We aren't all called to travel to Afghanistan to train medical doctors, obviously.  But we are all called to something in our current lives, right NOW, and I don't want to miss out on that for sure!!  :)

Great times.  Best dinner conversation in ages!

After the wedding we drove back to stay at the lake home of a dear friend's parents...the same place I took the kids to this past summer when our power was out for days and Jonas had to leave, same day, for Amsterdam.  :)  Guys, I was asleep by 9:30 and got TEN hours of sleep.  TEN!  It has literally--LITERALLY, Renee--been years.  It was heaven on earth to me.

We slowly got ready for the day and then headed into Duluth, right on the canal, to have breakfast at Amazing Grace Cafe.  Delicious stuff.

A slow drive home in the beautiful, sunny weather...and then we were home again.  Jonas did a lot of work in the yard/outside, getting ready for winter, and I just SAT inside, pretty much.  ;)

At 4:30 on Sunday we headed over to my parent's house to celebrate the Birthday of my Dad and brother Dan.  Jonas grilled the best steaks we have had at our house in a loooong time (bravo, honey!), and we had a great dinner together with Greg and Andrea in town from Rochester, and we even got to meet Dan's new girlfriend!

Fun, delightful times.

The End.

p.s.  The kids both got to bed at least an hour late last night.  Finn still got up at 5:45 a.m. this morning, but Layla at least slept until 7:45.  Good girl.  :)  Finn is just WAY too perky at such early hours of the day.

Layla

Phew.  I am pretty exhausted today.  We were in and out of the car all day, constantly moving, other than a 45 minute time period when Layla was in preschool, and I even pawned off one of my chores on Renee! Days like this are simply draining for me.  If I'm busy around the house all day that's one thing, but when I feel like I've spent SO much of my day in the car, I hate it.  So here I am, in bed, feet up, while Jonas takes over the spaghetti prep for the kids downstairs.  My first moment of peace all day.  Aaaaaaaaah.  :)  Lovely.

I forget if I mentioned Layla's vision in my last update about her (and I'm too lazy to go and check right now...).  The only other thing Jonas remembered about her 4 Year Well Child checkup, other than her 80th% for weight shocker, was that her vision is a little off.  Not too horrible yet, for sure, but she's on her way down.  Already.  :(  Gosh I feel sorry for her.  My vision is bad, and Jonas has horrid vision, so her genetic propensity to near-blindness is crazy high, that's for sure.

I remember getting my glasses as a kid--maybe 6th grade? 5th?--and being SHOCKED.  THAT was how people saw all the time?  It was amazing to see so clearly--everything!!  But, then the reality of wearing glasses sets in.  As soon as I could, in high school, I moved to contacts and never went back...that is until I had kids.  THEN how I felt about my appearance (the main reason I wore contacts, other than not liking the feel of having something on my face all day long...) took a BIG backseat to everything else in life demanding my attention.  But, at least as an adult I can buy new frames every few years, try to make myself look a little trendy even if I am wearing glasses, find frames that look good with my face shape and hair cut/color, etc.

Poor kids.  Kids who wear glasses get TEASED.  They break them.  They forget them.  Okay, maybe it should read more like "Poor parents of kids who have to wear glasses."  When she does get glasses I am going to try my hardest to make sure they look good on her, AND we'll be getting an insurance plan for them pronto.

Incredibly long, rambling story short:  Layla has vision that is going downhill.  But she doesn't need glasses.  Yet.

New topic:  (too tired for a transition)  I had Layla's first preschool conference today.  As a teacher, I hated/loved conferences.  When they were bad, they were AWFUL.  When they were good, they could almost make me cry happy tears.  There seemed to be very few in-between conferences.  Blech.  So glad those days are not in front of me right now.

Anyway, it was so funny to be on the parent end of conferences!  Keep in mind, this is preschool.  Glorified daycare.  But Layla loves it, and she really loves her teacher Mrs. Nelson.  Mrs. Nelson has been teaching at this school for at least 16 years, and she is very high energy and silly.  Layla especially adores when Mrs. Nelson gets silly, so I adore Mrs. Nelson for getting silly.  :)  I know that feeling, of being willing to do just about anything to get a child to pay attention and engage in something, but...man.  I'm also pretty sure I could never go to the level that preschool teachers go to when they try to get 3 and 4-year-old kids to learn something. That takes HUMILITY.

At the start of school they did a very (veeeeeeery) simple, one page assessment on each kid:

1.  How far can they count on their own? Layla could count well, but she had gaps.  She got 1-17, 21-27, etc.  I guess this is normal for this age.  We never really worked on anything other than counting to ten with her.
2.  Can they recognize their own name?  She can!  We have never worked on this with her, other than just this week when she has been asking me to write letters and numbers so she can copy them.  I wrote her name down, but I have seriously never tried to teacher her how to write it, recognize it, etc.
3.  Can they identify 8 different shapes?  She got 6 of the 8, initially.  Missed rectangle and oval.  Claire would totally have nailed those as a 2-year-old.  ;)  Again, maybe if Mama cared at all...and, you know...tried to teach her things...
4.  Can they identify 10 different colors?  She got 8 of the 10...missed brown and black.  That was interesting to me and made me think of my Dad, and his "these green pants are clearly blue" incident.

The teacher says she is totally normal and right on track, maybe above a bit, in what she knows and how she can learn.  This would make sense to me just because she is the oldest kid in her class, but it was also interesting to me how much I did not care about these things.  These things???  She'll get them.  Eventually.  In time.  No biggie at all.  I thought I might be a bit more protective of her, but I just can't work up the energy right now...she's fine.  ;)

Mrs. Nelson DID say that Layla likes to be silly.  She also likes to be silly with her new BFF Evie, who I guess she solidified her bond with this week.  Mrs. Nelson says they hug, tell each other "I love you," and hang out quite often.  CUTE!  (The "making her first friend away from Mama" part is cute, not the being silly part...that we will be keeping an eye on, but again...it's preschool.  I find myself not being able to work up any energy about a preschool kid who likes to be silly, right?  Don't worry.  I'm on it.  I'm watching.  I'm just not reacting very fast...)  ;)

When asked if I had any questions, I did.  Layla has a few speech delays that I know are normal for a 2 or 3-year-old, possibly, but now that she is 4 and in a formal school setting, I wondered what Mrs. Nelson thought about her speech.  She said "Oh, yeah!  That's right!  She doesn't have a few speech issues, and we do have a hard time understanding her every now and then, but it wasn't really at the front of my mind because she clearly is not a kid that needs fast intervention right now.  However, we should keep an eye on her, and we'll meet again in December or January to see if we think a speech evaluation is the right way to go."  So, I'm glad I asked.  Because I feel like as her parent, he speech issues are so cute to me, and in some ways I hope they stay as long as possible--as long as they are just normal kid things.  BUT, if she really does have a speech problem of some sort, as minor as it may be, I would like her to be seen ASAP and have things evaluated and taken care of before she becomes self-conscious of it, or before other kids tease her, etc.

(Her speech issues are her inability to say the letters "L, "F," and the "Th" blend, which I know is a more advanced skill than the "L" or "F."  She also loves to talk like a baby at times, which I know is also a little kid thing, but I sometimes find myself wondering if she is doing that for a reason.  There may be other things too that I'm forgetting right now.)

Mrs. Nelson asked if there had been any speech issues on either side of the family, because I guess if a parent/aunt/uncle/grandparent had issues, then it tends to be more common in the family?  This seemed odd to me, but maybe it's just because I've never heard this before.  Genetics are strange creatures.  Anyway, I couldn't think of any--I felt like maybe one of my brothers was seen for a very short time, but I can't remember who it might have been.  Dan?  Eric?  I feel like I just remember funny stories being told around the dinner table of their impressions of speech therapy, but I could be wrong.  Did any Schaefer boys / parents have speech issues?  I guess I don't know that either.  :)  We'll find out.

In addition to this, it dawned on me that Layla had her tongue clipped when she has just a few weeks old--maybe 3 or 4?--to help her nurse better.  While we both doubted this had anything to do with how she currently pronounces letters, it is something to ask about, I guess, if we meet with the speech pathologist eventually.

So, that's it for now.  Conference #1 down, 2 or 3 more to go per child, for the next 14 years or so... Bring it.

Finn

1.  I would say that, at this point, potty training with Finn is about 80% successful.  That missing 20% is mostly likely my fault.  With Layla, the first two days we were potty training her we had an adult by her side AT ALL TIMES.  At the start you want to make sure they "get it right," so we were there to catch her if anything seemed off for her.  But, she was totally fine.  Finn is really "making" me train him at this point, which I wasn't planning on/didn't really want to do, so...I've been less than vigilant.  In fact, I've been MISERABLE at sticking close to him.  :)  This has resulted in scrubbing the furniture a few times--gross.  Layla never did that!--AND, worst of all, he pooped on the floor of the changing table today, and on the changing pad itself.  This was about 2 hours after Jonas left for KC, so maybe it was a silent protest for his Papa, like dogs sometimes do?  Nah.  It was not.  He just doesn't "get it" yet, and I was not there.  Sigh.  Layla found this and was so grossed out by it.  She came running to get me and complained about the smell, of course, for hours after.  :)

2.  I forgot to mention Finn's escape from the crib two nights ago.  He has only climbed out of his crib once before in his life, and I think it was a total fluke.  He couldn't figure out how to do it again (months ago).  So, the other night, when he was so miserable and sick, I was doing everything I could to help him sleep/breathe/not cough at night:  Essential oils on his back, chest, and feet, humidifier going with essential oils and vicks vapor steam in it, Hylands homeopathic cough syrup, Hylands homeopathic cold tablets, diffusing essential oils in the room...AND last but not least, I propped up one end of his crib at a fairly significant angle so his nose might drain better.  Yes.  Yes, I know.  This all sounds like crazy-lady overkill, right?  Wrong.  You guys, he was up 15-20 times the night before!  I was SHOT.  I was going to do anything and everything to help him (and ME) sleep.  So, despite all of this he was still waking up coughing and such, and then around 12:00 a.m. he comes sauntering out of his room..."Oh, hello Mama!" Like "Fancy meeting you here!?!?!"  Yeah.  I guess that blanket under his mattress was all the boots he needed to make it over the top.  Tonight it's GONE.  :)  He tried to climb out when I put him in tonight, but no luck, so eventually he settled down and went to sleep.  Fingers crossed for THIS night, sans Jonas.  (Oh, and last night he really only woke up twice--that was his first night on antibiotics from the Dr.--so maybe that was what he needed all along.  Doesn't matter, though, I'm still doing all my witch-Dr. stuff just in case... ;)  )

*Yawn*

Random updates from a very tired Mama:

1.  Finn is naked right now.  He has basically been naked for several days now.  Two days ago he decided that clothes were VERY optional, and no matter what I do/put him in, I find him naked within about 20 minutes.  I found out outfit he couldn't get out of, but he made my life so miserable for the 1.5 hours he was wearing it that I decided it's just not worth it: naked it is.  So, we've been doing some potty training.  I don't think it's as effective at this age (2.5-ish) as it was when we trained Layla (3 years, 4 months...and she really trained herself at that point), but oh well.  I'm not rushed or "trying to MAKE THIS HAPPEN!" so hopefully it'll just be positive.  That's all I ask at this point.  I suppose I could try duct taping his diapers to his body, but...eh.

2.  Same child had a VERY rough night last night.  He's been sick for 2-3 days, mostly with a VERY runny nose during the day, and then constant coughing/choking on his own mucus at night.  His breathing got worse last night too, so we're off to the Dr. today.  Jonas leaves for a tour of KC BBQ joints with Scooter and Ben on Saturday, and I need healthy and sleeping kids by then! Seriously, though, I think Finn woke up at least 15-20 times last night because he couldn't breathe/was coughing.  Poor kid.  :(  He was misery.  He finally woke up and stayed up at 4:30 a.m.  *yaaaaaaaaawn*

3.  Layla woke up at 6:00 today.  Just because.

4.  I know I had more to say, but my brain is fried.  I'll remember it later and come back to update, if I'm not asleep on my feet...

I remembered one!
5.  Layla has been so funny about smell lately.  She acts like she has the world's most sensitive sense of smell.  She can't stand the smell of a ton of things that I think have almost no smell at all...like apples, for crying out loud!  The funniest one is bananas, though.  If she is even in the same room with a banana (out of the peel) she sort of flips out.  Gets as far away from it as she can, covers her mouth with her hand, and hides her head in her arms.  Wowza.  Seeeeeeeeeeeensitive.  :)  Now imagine her reaction to something that actually HAS a strong scent, in my opinion...yeah...

Today:

Layla did more painting this morning.  WITH my approval.  AT the counter.  :)

"Mama, look!  I made an H!"

Explain to me how THIS child can be in the 80th% for weight???

She looks like a skinny bean to me, other than her cheeks.  :)  

Finn is sick today.  When he is sick, he LOOKS sick.  

I've been using essential oils with him for the past two days to help with coughing and breathing, which has helped I think, but I have NO cure for his constant mucus production.  He's drowning in it, poor baby.  :(

My poor sick little boy...

Sneaky

Sooooooooooooooooooooo...

Layla.

She has added a skill to her behavioral development in the last few weeks:  being sneaky.

I'll sometimes notice her finding something she knows she can't have, and rather than give it to me (as she used to do) she'll look at it for a moment, then this "LOOK" will come over her face, and she'll hide it behind her back.  Right in front of me.  In the most laughable, obvious fashion ever.  And then slowly back away from me.  Smiling right at me.  

Oh, honey.  

I am raising a little SINNER!!!! ;)

This above video was taken yesterday afternoon.  I told her she couldn't paint while I was making dinner because it was too messy.  Her response?  "Okay.  I want to go outside to talk to Papa."  She went through a LOT of work to get dressed, find her shoes, etc. and then went outside to Jonas...with a box of paints in her hands.  I let her, mostly just because I wanted to see this play out.  :)  She came back in with the box open, hid it behind her back, and edged out of the kitchen.  She set up the paints on the bottom of the 2nd floor stairs, then went and got herself a glass of water...so I wouldn't see her in the kitchen.  Then she came back in and told me "Mama, I need somepin to draw on."  Paper...the final step.  So, I got her some and asked if she needed some crayons or markers:  "No."  Big smile.  Loving her own deception.  Little STINKER!  I probably shouldn't have let her go on, but I was just so curious.  :)  After a while, without me SEEING her, she somehow moved the entire operation out to the back porch steps.  I guess that makes sense...less likely for me to find her out there.  But I have no idea how she got it all by me in the kitchen.  So, then I saw her and filmed that video.

To her credit, she didn't make a mess at all.  ;)

This is so ending soon.  Jonas and I had a little "chat" about it last night and are ready to go into action now.  ;)

Crafts with Mama:

This feels like the first time in about 2 weeks where I've actually spent any fun time with Layla, doing something other than snuggling with her.  She loved stringing together this necklace, and then later we made one with a color pattern.  :)  

October 15th: National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Day.

I don't really write about this often, if at all, because quite frankly I don't really feel compelled to share much on this topic.  

It is so deep.  So personal.  So painful.  And it can be so isolating.  But in recent times it's become much more common to talk publicly about the grief that comes from the loss of a child.  This is good news, for sure.  Anytime something doesn't have to be kept in the dark, secret and hidden,...well, it's a least a good place to start.  So I'm glad it's more of a topic of conversation now, and that women who have lost their babies can find real comfort and community in the thousands of women just like them, all over the world, especially through social media and websites.  

I'm noting this day for two reasons:

#1 and #2:  I had two children that died.  I HAVE two children that are dead.  They lived, they mattered, they were loved, they were wanted, and they died.  They deserve mention in my life every now and then (out loud), I think, even if it is on a regular day or pattern, and even if it might make anyone else uncomfortable.  

Even if it makes anyone else roll their eyes a little and think "get over it already."  No one has ever, ever said that to my face...but I know I've gotten that "vibe" from people through conversation, in a nice round-about MN passive-aggressive way:  "Oh, yeah, it happens.  SO many women experience it.  We just move on...aren't you glad for your LIVING kids??" Part of this is true.  So many women DO experience it.  25% of all pregnancies will end in death.  Anytime I am pregnant I have a 3/4 chance of meeting that child.  Believe me, that fact never leaves my side, my mind, or my heart.  But does the fact that many women experience it somehow lessen the sheer horror of it?  Death???  DEATH?  It's common, so therefore...what?  Get over it?   I have to believe this idea is often repeated thoughtlessly, or by someone who has never experienced death happen in her own body, or by someone who has not grieved often in their life.  Otherwise, I can't really find a good excuse for it.  

Grief is strange.  I grieved in ways that I know, full well, were NOT okay with people around me.  However, I knew deep down that I was doing what I needed to do to get through my grief.  I know that for sure.  I feel as strongly about that now as I did then.  I did what I needed to do, I survived, and I made it out to the other side where I could function again.  Where I looked "normal" to everyone else.  But I am not the same person I was.  Grief changes you, and I think that's good.  Grief, like love, helped shape and mold me into part of the person I am today.  Grief is not wrong.  Grief is necessary.  It does not go away when you can finally stop crying...it just becomes something different in your life.  And it's always there.  Not in a bad "cloud over your head" kind of way...but THINK about it!  I had kids.  They died.  Why would we expect this to NOT impact me??  Why would we think any different?  I don't know.  Maybe because it's messy, and there isn't a guide book, and there is no clear cut, black-and-white, right answer to how to handle each and every situation.  

I have many random thoughts, oh-so-many tangents I could go down...but I don't really feel the need to.  I'll end this here today.  My thoughts on this topic are mostly kept in my head...not because I feel silenced at all by people around me, or society.  It's just the way I prefer things for now.  Maybe in the future I'll want to open up more about it, rather than just once a year...and if so, so be it.  But for now, this is enough.

My love to everyone who knows what I am talking about here.  

My love to those of you who don't, as well.  

Layla's 4 Year Well Child checkup:

Because I was still in my "recovery" phase of healing, Jonas ended up taking Layla (and Finn) to Layla's 4 Year "Well Child" check on Monday.  I had completely forgotten about it in all of the focus on my rear end for the past week, so I was very thankful he was home from work and could take her without having to reschedule.

I warned Jonas ahead of time that I thought she needed to get a shot (just one at age 4, thankfully), and my only method of keeping the hysteria to a minimum:  the suckers need to be IN the room BEFORE the shots happen.  Finn absolutely hates it when Layla has to get a shot, so he FREAKS out and sobs in terror while I hold Layla's upper body down and the nurse gives her shots in the thigh.  I'll have to stop bringing him to these appointments when he gets to the age of being able to remember long term...these for sure will scar him for life.  He hates Layla getting a shot much more than getting his own shots...but that's likely because Layla is a Drama Queen.  QUEEN.  The nurses are so good, and so quick--amazingly quick.

(I mean, I guess I should have a little mercy here...it's been a while since I've had regular childhood vaccines, but I do get the flu vaccine, and the TDap every time I'm pregnant, and those seem like very mild, quick shots.  However, maybe the shots to HER feel like that lidocain shot felt to me in the ER.  If that is even close to the truth...wow.  We might have to start taking some alternative medicine, because...DANG.)

Needless to say, Layla screams and wails and gnashes teeth.  Finn cries for 20 seconds and then is done.  Layla?  We have to stay in the room for a good 15 minutes after her shots to get her calmed down.  And then she limps for the rest of the day, and tells the horrible story over and over.  :)  Poor kid.  Life is gonna be a little...rough, me thinks.

Anyway, Jonas was NOT helping my peace of mind by texting me ominous texts every 20 seconds, like "Yeah, it's all Dr. Happy now, but just wait until the needles come out!!!" etc.  I think I got at least 5 from him.  It's amazing he heard anything the Dr. actually said to him, really, with all the texting that was going on.  I wonder where Layla got her dramatic flair?  ;)

The only stat that Jonas remembered from her appointment is that Layla is now in the 80th% for weight.  EIGHTY.  That is INSANE.  She has never broken above the 50th% in anything, pretty much ever!!  However, I'm not really surprised.  For the past 3 months she has been hungry all day, every day.  She will eat FOUR pieces of toast for breakfast, then be asking for food 1 hour later.  The sheer volume she consumes at every meal has drastically increased.  Despite all of this, she is still right on target for the sizes she wears, and I still have to find skinny jeans/pants for her, or pants that have adjustable waists because she needs them on tightest possible setting or they will fall off her non-existent hips!  I'm trying to figure out where she is putting this weight:  her cheeks??  A little in the tummy, maybe, but not much.  :)

Anyway, that's about it.  As I didn't go, I don't have much more to report.  Jonas said she freaked out for her shot, but then calmed down somewhat faster than normal and was even smiling and waving to all the (laughing) nurses on her way out, saying "Thank You!!!" :)

Cutie.

My anus / rectum / all things rear-end involved:

Be warned, this post contains somewhat personal information.  As I am not an overly guarded person, I don't mind sharing my life this way, but if YOU are squeamish about personal sharing, or the correct anatomical terms for body parts, then you might want to take a pass on this entry.  



Ah, dear friends.  Sorry about the post title, but really...how often do you get to use the word anus?  Probably not very often.  Rather, not often enough!! ;)  I think it's a little silly to be offended with words like anus, just as much as "butt" or "ass."  Relax.  It'll be okay.  They are just words.  :)

(1st side note:  I can't stand it when people make up pet names for body parts because they are embarrassed about them, or they were raised to never talk about them, etc. A body part is a body part!  It is not inherently good or bad.  It deserves to just be named (scientifically), without grimacing/giggling/blushing, and then move on with life in a collected manner.  I cam very firmly to this conclusion as a teacher, although I think my parents were somewhat this way as well, if my memory serves right.  As a parent I am even more so.  Finn knows that his penis is a penis.  Layla knows the word vagina. We will never use pet names for these body parts, or hopefully any body part.  It's weird to do so, I think.  If the fact that I wrote these words makes you squeam, then YOU are one of the people I am talking about!! ;)  Don't raise your kids to be embarrassed about their body parts before they even have one single reason, right?  Right.)

So.

This has been a very difficult week for me.  I was in pretty much constant pain for 6 days straight.  Today is Monday, October 14th, and it's the first day I have had relief from this pain in a week.  Relief is so WONDERFUL.

Last Monday I started having pain, both internal and external, in/around/near my anus.

This is not the sort of thing that "polite" society talks about, I know, but I've been questioning the wisdom of that this week.  Why not?  If I had horrible headaches for week I'd have felt free to ask for any and all tips on Facebook, right? So why not my anus?  Clearly, it's social tabu, but I think for the wrong reasons.  However, I'm not exactly trying to fix all social wrongs through FB, so I left that one alone, but if/when people that I knew asked me what was wrong through the week, I told the truth.  I didn't fudge the truth.  I didn't try to evade the question.  For some reason, this became important to me.  Probably some part of me still felt embarrassed by the whole thing, deep down, even though my brain held other thoughts to be true...so I was trying to sort of preach to myself in a way.  Who knows?  That's just how it went.  However, I did try to give people an "out":  if they asked me what was wrong I would usually say it was something that was wrong with my ass, and if they wanted to know more I'd be happy to share, but I realize that most people are uncomfortable with that region of the body.  Most people did not take me up on knowing more, which I was totally fine with, but some did...and I was fine with sharing medical facts.  :)  I did intentionally use the word "ass" or "butt" with other people because I know that the word "anus," though CORRECT, makes many adults squirm.  So, even though "ass" is a more crass, non-scientific cop-out, I did use that word. Out of love.  Not everyone can adjust to a life of scientific accuracy in a day, even grown, college-educated adults.  ;)

So, what was wrong with me?  GET ON WITH THE STORY ALREADY, right?

Two issues:
1.  Internal anal fissures.
2.  An external abscess in my upper butt crack.  I'm not sure what the scientific term is for upper butt crack, but if I knew I'd use it.

I had a regularly scheduled appointment with my OB/GYN already for Thursday afternoon, so I thought I'd just muscle out my pain (which wasn't really "severe" until Wednesday) until then.  I didn't KNOW those were my issues, though, or I certainly would have gone in sooner.  I believe in doctors and modern medicine!!

(2nd side note:  You've heard my modern medicine speech, right?  It seems to be a big trend these days to be "anti modern medicine."  The general gist seems to be this:  "The old ways are always better, the more we learn the more we try to play God, anything not found in nature is bad for your body, etc."  This argument seems to come strongly from two camps:  extreeeeeem conservative Christians, and the extremely "crunchy/hippy/granola" types (which sometimes/often overlap).   Correction:  that is where *I* have heard it coming from most loudly, in the form of my personal life experience and media exposure.  

I don't disagree with part of their argument.  I think there is a LOT of good and truth to be found in "some" older medicine practices, uses of herbs, oils, etc.  I reject very much the idea that modern medicine is bad, run only by money, out to get you addicted to meds, etc.  There are some very awful, totally un-scientific things that were done in the past, as medicine, that I am SO glad we don't do anymore!  We know BETTER now!  Yay for science!  Yay for research, progress, and learning!  Also, I think there are a lot of very great things that older health practices still continue to teach us--no need to throw the baby entirely out with the bath water, right?  But that takes time.  Time to look at both, research, and evaluate.  Most people just want to be in one camp or the other, and surround themselves with like thinkers.  Why can't we do both??  :(  Why can't we learn fro the past and grow into the future??  We can, obviously, but that can sometimes be an isolating and lonely place to be.  Moderation is rarely celebrated, right?  Middle-ground is seen as being wishy-washy and not really picking a side.  Sigh.  

The reason I have my two children is due to modern medicine.  When everything was done naturally I had two children that died.  When modern medicine got involved, I had two children who lived.  There is no natural herb out there that could have diagnosed my very rare blood clotting disorders and held them in check, in very precise and delicate ways, during my two full-term pregnancies.  I am SO THANKFUL for modern medicine.  

At the same time, I do think that modern medicine is often mistaken for true health care.  Most people go to doctors when they have a problem, NOT regularly, in order to truly take care of their bodies.  Therefore, doctors specialize in problems--and boy do they do it well!  I'm so thankful for their expertise!  However, I think there is for SURE a place at the table for nutritionists, holistic medicine practitioners, chiropractors, essential oils use, etc, etc.  

I choose BOTH.  :)  Both are good, both have things they are good for and NOT good for.  You just have to be smart, and spend a little bit of time being informed.  The end.)

Back to my story.  My OB/GYN calmed my fears that I had hemorrhoids.  I did not, thank God.  Having watched Jonas deal with that nightmare for years and years, before he got his life-changing surgery (again, thank you modern medicine...), I was rather petrified that I had somehow been "blessed," by marriage, with the poor curse of the Schaefer men.  :(  This makes absolutely no sense, of course, but I was 4 days in pain at this point, and seeing no end in sight.  My OB/GYN, rather, diagnosed anal fissures.  He wasn't 100% certain, being an OB, not a colo-rectal surgeon, but he said he was 90% certain without the use of a scope.  For that, there was really nothing for me to do but rest and take lots of hot baths.  He said they normally resolve themselves on their own, without any need of medical intervention, and gave me some good thoughts on how they can maybe be prevented in the future.  Very helpful.  I was still in pain, but at least I had a bit of hope.

He then noted the abscess.  At this point, his training may have failed him a little (well, he likely did the best he could, he is just not a colo-rectal surgeon, trained to see these things all the time/diagnose them), because he said it looked like a blocked sweat gland, or an enlarged pimple.  At that point, the abscess was painful but not killer, so I told him I could handle that pain--I was frankly more concerned about an internal tear that just had to heal on its own!  They said that after a week of rest and baths, if things weren't better, I should maybe go in and be seen again.  Okay.  So, I had some direction at this point.  That is helpful for sure.

I went home, barely able to drive through my tears of pain, and basically collapsed into a ball on my bed.  I pretty much didn't move for 3 days.  The pain was excruciating.  My hips began to become sore from the number of hours I was laying on my sides each day--my stomach and back were too painful.  Jonas stayed home from work on Friday to take care of the kids, so I could be still.  I took 5 baths a day, at minimum, every day.

As time went on I began to feel that my internal pain really was becoming less and less, but sometimes this was hard to notice because the external pain was so awful!  That was clearly getting worse and worse.  After an awful night on Friday night, where I likely woke up 10 times from pain, I decided that I might need Jonas to take me to the ER on Saturday.  However, Saturday I started feeling okay.  If I was reeeeeeeeeeally still, things seemed to settle down.  I could breathe slightly normal again.  So, I decided to tough it out...maybe I would really turn around by Sunday!

Alas, Saturday night was not so kind to me.  I realized my healing was mostly internal, which was great, but not to be outmatched by the increasing external pain.  It was completely and utterly taking over my life.  I could do NOTHING all day long.  Someone else had to take care of my kids all day.  This was not going to work for any sort of life, so I told Jonas we needed to go to the ER early on Sunday morning.

My mom, bless her, came over to watch our kids rather than going to church, and we headed out to the ER...me with the seat fully reclined, balanced on my side, wincing at each and every bump/turn in the road.

(3rd side note:  One thing I love about where we live is our close proximity to so many great hospitals.  There are specialists for every disease/problem under the sun, and if that's not enough for you, you could make the "long" 1.5 hour drive south to Rochester, MN, where the Mayo clinic is located (and where my lovely sister-in-law Andrea is training to become a nurse anesthetist)--world leaders and amazingly rich people from all over the world fly to MN for their medical care.  What I also love is how MN takes care of the non-rich among us.  We really do have pretty darn good health care and education in this state, but I am especially thankful to MN for helping us out when Jonas was unemployed and I was pregnant, high-risk, with Finn.  My $1,500 a month shots and our hospital bill were totally covered, after we applied for help, because mothers and babies are such high priority here.  I know the same is true for maternal and fetal health nation wide, too, but I will always be grateful to the State of MN for taking care of my family, me, and the health of my little boy when we really needed it most.  They didn't restrict where I could be seen, ever, or who my Dr. could be, and I got the BEST medical care I could have hoped for.  They allowed me to drive 18 miles to St. Louis Park, MN, because that is where I wanted to be cared for in a specialty clinic.  One result of that generosity was my healthy pregnancy and safe delivery of Finn.  Color me grateful.  Bravo, MNCare.  Bravo.  The end.)

When we were caretakers at the apartment building I knew that I could have a croupy child at an ER in literally 5 minutes.  FIVE.  When a child is struggling to breathe, that is so huge to the relief of a mother's heart.  At that living situation we were near 4 hospitals...none more than a mile from where we lived!  However, they are all also located in downtown St. Paul.  When we take a child there at 3:00 a.m., especially when I would take them to a children's specialty hospital, the lines were usually not long.  But I knew that any hospital located in the downtown area usually has longer ER waits for adults, paying for parking, etc., so this time we headed out to a hospital we had never been to:  St. John's in Maplewood.  Now, we actually live very close to Maplewood...just blocks away, really.  I had completely forgotten that this hospital was there because very little in my life is located in Maplewood, other than Costco (thank you, Holly!).  :)  The other week Jonas and I made note of it as we were driving to a restaurant because it really seems to be the closest one to our house, so that is where we headed Sunday morning.   Also, I have a friend who works in the ER in Regions Hospital in downtown St. Paul, and I just didn't want to present her with my anus on a lovely Fall Sunday morning.  ;)

St. John's Hospital was such a pleasant surprise.  Everything and everyone there was beyond nice, helpful, thoughtful, and good at their jobs.  I LOVE that.  However, I have this thing about hospitals...I end up crying a good portion of the time I'm there, usually.  It's lame.  Don't get me wrong...I have no fear of hospitals.  In fact, they are very reassuring and comforting to me.  It's just that normally when I'm there I'm either giving birth, and all hormonal before and after, or I'm getting a D&C and beyond hormonal and sad.  So, yeah.  Hospitals tend to make me cry.  This time was no exception.  At the reception desk, when the nice lady asked what was wrong, I just broke down into tears.  6 days of pain wore me down, man.  I was DONE.  I had some hope that they could just lance the sucker and send me home a new woman, but I was also fearful that they would say I needed to see a specialist, take hours for the appointment, maybe send me home to come back the next day, etc.  I could NOT wait any longer for help.  Clearly I had waiter too long to go in.

(4th side note:  Yes.  I know.  I am making this story, which could be very quick, into a long, drawn-out  saga.  I have no idea why.  I just feel like writing today.  Normally I stay AWAY from this type of writing on my blog, as it is not why it was created, but I'm just going with it for today.  Eh.)

The triage nurse was very sweet and thoughtful.

The first doctor who saw me did a great job of getting lots of notes and patient history, was very reassuring to me, etc.  He was VERY concerned that I cried the whole time.  I think he thought it meant that I was in absolute, extreme pain.  Everything was very painful, but maybe not as bad as I looked from the outside.  He kept wanting to give me some sort of pain meds.  Especially morphine.  :)  Now, anyone who knows me knows that I am rarely, if ever, one to say no to pain meds.  Do you have pain?  Is there a medication that can stop it?  Great!  That is my general philosophy for things like menstrual cramps, which can't be avoided for those of us so unfortunate to get them.  However, this was a totally different situation for me.  I didn't want them to give me anything to make me feel better until I knew what their action plan was.  I didn't want morphine, feel good for a few hours, and then be sent home to suffer again while I waited for an appointment tomorrow, you know?  No sir.  No pain meds until they told me the PLAN.

After looking at me he said I had an abscess and that it would likely need to be lanced.  However, not being in that specialty, he wasn't sure if it was safe for him to do quickly in the ER, or if I needed a specialist to do it in an OR.  So, he called the colon-rectal surgeon to get her opinion...and she JUST so happened to be on her way to the hospital to round as they were talking.  Thank you Jesus.  She also agreed to stop and see me before doing her rounds.  Again, thank you Jesus.

Dr. Jensen was, also, very sweet...and she didn't mind listening to my story through constant tears.  I wasn't sounding like I was crying in my voice, but those tears just kept rolling down my cheeks all day.  :(  After taking a look she agreed that it was something she could take care of right there, quickly, in 10 minutes or less.  And she agreed that it looked bad.  And painful.  Bless her for validating my ER visit.

The procedure itself was very simple:  She shot me up with some lidocaine (a common local anesthetic that hurts like the MOTHER when entering your body) and then two cuts to open up the abscess (removing some skin to keep it open), pressure to fully drain it, and done.

 But let's go back to that lidocaine shot for a moment.  Holy CRAP.  You know, when I was 9 I had a mole removed from my back that was suspected of being cancerous.  It was huge and deep.  Before they could remove it they gave me 7 shots of lidocaine.  I was immediately brought back there with this ONE shot...it feels like someone stuck a burning hot needle under your skin, and then is threading it through your skin, muscle, and tissue in a horrible, burning pattern.  It is awful.  Those 7 shots in my back were bad, but this one in my butt/rear-end/ass (not sure if "anus" applies here because it wasn't near my actual anus...) had me almost hear hyperventilating.  I squeezed the heck out of J's hand and barely held myself together.  Yeah, not my proudest moment.

Another thing I am beginning to realize about myself is that I must have an incredibly low pain tolerance.  Seriously.  Layla's 36 hour childbirth about killed me.  The only thing that saved me was my epidural.  (again:  God BLESS modern medicine.  Clearly I would have died young in pioneer times).

After that it was smooth sailing.  Dr. Jensen said there was a lot of pus in the abscess, and she said it clearly would have been painful and needed to be professionally taken care of.  When I asked her WHY I got it, she just shrugged and said "really bad luck.  It happens sometimes."  There was nothing I could have done to prevent it, and nothing I can do to prevent them in the future.  So, I guess I'm glad I didn't do something wrong, but not so thrilled (now that I've experienced one) that they can happen again at any time, for no good reason.  Stupid fallen world.  :(

Dr. Jensen also mentioned, before the surgery, that the abscess would take up to 2 weeks, maybe more, to heal.  It would continue to slowly drain during that time, possibly.  (*silent throw-up from Lisa*) Also, there is a 1/3 chance that I can develop a fistula because of the abscess.  A FISTULA!!!!  The only kind of fistula I knew about was the kind women in 3rd world countries develop when they endure traumatic childbirths in poor medical conditions with no good medical follow-up and care.  Those sound horrific.  I guess fistula is also a generic medical term that basically means "when two things become connected," or something like that.  (I'm writing this from my memory of her talk to me, not from Google...)  Sooooo, there is a chance that this abscess and my rectum could somehow become connected again, through the decision of my body, and if that happened I would need to have legit surgery.  Gah.  So, fingers crossed that I am NOT in that 1/3 camp in future days.  :(

Dr. #1 came back in as I was preparing to leave and, again, really wanted me to take a prescription for some Oxycodone with me.  :)  Bless him.  I agreed, even though I didn't think I'd really need it.  Now that the reason for the pain was gone, how bad could the pain be??

Well, there was actually still some pain.  So I was glad for the prescription the first night of real healing.  BUT I think I only took 2 of the 20 pills he gave me.  Haha!  JACKPOT!  I am so saving those up.  Love it.

Walking out of the hospital was pretty funny.  EVERYONE stopped what they were doing to wish me well and say goodbye to me:  nurses, janitors, security people, front desk people.  Evidently my tears really made a mark.  ;)  Drama Queen, right?  Sheesh.  :)



So, that's been the last week of my life.  Sigh.

I'm sorry to say I have no cute pictures, videos, or stories of the kids to post...because I've barely seen them for a week.  Jonas has been a Saint in helping out so much, and my family has pitched in some too.  It takes a good village, people!  Grateful for my village all the time.

Seriously, though.  I feel like the kids look SO much bigger today.  They seem older, smarter, funnier, cuter. I am a little sad I missed the last week of life!  The last week of Fall!  It was so pretty here the entire time I was flat in bed, and now that I'm getting better it's drab and rainy.

BUT.  I am getting better.  And I am so grateful.  :)  Phew.  Let me say again:  I do not handle pain well.

End of my saga on my anus, rectum, and everything else involved in that region.

El Fin.

Random updates:

1.  Layla had a HORRIBLE nightmare two nights ago.  I just felt awful for her.  I think it was maybe 3:00 a.m. when I heard her screeeeeeeaming on the monitor.  When I ran in there she was curled up in the fetal position, both hands pressed tight to her eyes.  I tried to comfort her and calm her down, but she just remained tense and tight.  I took her to the bathroom, because 90% of the time, if she wakes up at night, it's just because she needs to go to the bathroom.  She went, but still with both hands pressed tightly to her face.  Her talk was something about "the big one" and "make it go away," etc.  Finally I just had to play along a bit and tell her that Mommy got "it," "it" was gone now, etc.  I sloooowly pried her hands away from her face, and she looked around the room frantically in total fear.

My heart just broke.  Oh, age 4.  I remember you.  The age the nightmares started.  :(  I think I had some bad, bad dreams from about age 4 to age 8, as far as I can remember.

  Last night was the first night we have had to leave Layla's closet door all the way open, with the light on, when she went to bed.  She was still afraid.  Poor Baby.  I talked to her a bit about it, and I am thinking it was a dragon she was afraid of...at least that's what she told me last night.  Who knows if it was what she was afraid of the night before.  She asked to come in with us the night of the nightmare, which of course I said yes to--you could feel the fear melting off of her as she left the room with me.  :(  Once again, SO glad I held out for that king size bed when we got married.  Jonas couldn't understand my absolute insistence on it...but I knew.  ;)


2.  I know people who can function just fine, regularly, on 4-6 hours of sleep a night.  This seems insane to me, as I as someone who needs 8-9 hours to feel "great."  Because I know myself, I normally make a very high priority of going to bed at a very reasonable time.  Rarely will I ever got to bed after 10:00, especially with having kids--you never know when you'll need to get up, right?  Well, last night I made a mistake.  I stayed up until 11:45 p.m. watching TV.  SO lame.  Such a bad choice.  But it was fun at the time.  :)

Of course, on nights when you make a bad personal decision, what happens?  You know the answer to this.  That's right:  kids happen.  ;)  Finn actually did just fine "sleeping through the night," but after 10 hours of sleep he decided that was enough...at 5:00 a.m.  UGH.  He is the worst too, because he wakes up and wants to DO STUFF AND GET BREAKFAST RIGHT AWAY COME ON MAMA!  It's so jarring (at least when Layla wakes up she will snuggle with me in bed for ages!).  As I had only been asleep for 5 hours (which I know is fine for some people, yes, I get it...just not for me...), this was not okay.  I was walking through cement to get to him.  I try to bribe Finn with a movie/show of some sort when he wakes up, but this rarely goes as planned.  He is just so neeeeedy when he wakes up, and he especially likes to poke at my closed eyes if I somehow find a way to rest again.  Twerp.  ;)  Then, Layla woke up  around 5:45--SO unusual for her, but of course, this was the morning for it, right?  I finally got them both settled in my bed, next to me, watching a "Team Umi Zoomie" episode on my Kindle while I tried to at least rest some more.

 Evidently the episode they watched was about cereal, because about 22 minutes later Layla was convinced that we all needed to go downstairs and eat "cereal and milk."  Keep in mind, my kids have NEVER had cereal and milk (like normal kids!) because of their allergies.  But, I had some almond milk on hand, and miracle-of-miracles some cereal too.  I poured them each a bowl, and Layla had to check and make sure that it looked like the picture on the front.  After that, all she did was stir it around and around.  Finn actually took two bites!  I was impressed, but neither of them wanted anything to do with the rest of it.  Ah, well.  At least they have now had cereal.  :)

Sorry!

Sorry about the lack of blog posts lately, folks.  I've tried several times lately, but I keep having computer issues.  My favorite one is when it shuts down randomly.  Super fun.  ;)

We're working on it, so hopefully soon!

(counting the seconds until it may crash again...so this is a short one.)